Search Results

There’s a tongue‑in‑cheek term floating around these days called “girl math.” It’s the art of rationalizing purchases or spending habits that might otherwise be labeled indulgent—or even irresponsible. Little did I know, my mother trained me in this long before the phrase was coined. After a shopping spree, Mom and I would leave our bags tucked safely in the trunk. Slowly, over time, we’d move the purchases inside. So, when Dad asked if my outfit was new, I could honestly say no—after all, it had technically been “around” for a while. A dear college friend of mine, Terri Smith‑Kiesenhofer, recently shared her own version of girl math. She and her travel friends each contribute $200 a month into a shared savings account. When vacation time rolls around, all the mutual expenses—meals, Ubers, excursions—come out of that fund. Other than airfare, no one has to split checks or tally receipts. The theory is simple: if you’ve already paid for it, it’s basically free. Other examples of girl math are equally brilliant: If you loan someone money and they pay you back, that’s found money. Spending from a Venmo balance feels like the purchase is “on the house.” Souvenirs bought in foreign currency don’t count as spending real money. Buying in‑store instead of online means you’ve “saved” by avoiding shipping. If you didn’t spend today, you’ve earned splurge money for tomorrow. Talking yourself out of a purchase is the same as making money. Returns with store credit? That’s house money, ready to play again. My personal favorite is the prepaid surprise. Pay for a vacation six months in advance, and when the trip arrives, it feels complimentary. Or buy something during QVC’s Christmas in July, then forget about it until December when a package shows up at your door—a happy little “no‑charge” surprise. Of course, I’m not suggesting anyone go into debt chasing these playful equations. But who doesn’t love a little splurge now and then? And if you can justify it with girl math, all the better.

When you reach your queen-age years, the holidays often carry a bittersweet weight. This is the stage of life when many of us are losing—or have lost—parents and other loved ones. Sometimes the loss is physical, and sometimes it’s ambiguous: a loved one is still here but emotionally or cognitively distant, as with dementia or estrangement. Either way, grief can feel sharper during a season so centered on family and tradition. So how do we cope with grief over the holidays? For me, the first Christmas after my father passed, I needed distance and change. My daughter and I planned a trip to the European Christmas markets, hoping to get lost in the magic of something new. It turned out to be exactly what we needed. Even as we wandered through twinkling stalls, we found ourselves saying things like, “Oh, Poppa would love this,” or “Poppa would have thought this was funny.” We didn’t forget him—we simply gave ourselves space from old traditions for that moment. Now, my mom is living with memory loss. Some days she is aware, and other days she is not. Celebrating with her looks different. My daughter and I try not to overwhelm or expect too much. Instead, we savor the small glimmers—the smiles, the gentle laughs, the fleeting moments of remembrance. What has worked for me may not work for you, but here are some suggestions that might help if you’re grieving and worried about the holidays intensifying that pain: Allow yourself to feel. It’s okay to be sad, angry, or numb. You don’t have to hide your emotions. Lean on trusted friends and family. Let them support you. If you don’t have a reliable support system, consider a therapist or grief support group. Build a chosen family. Blood isn’t the only bond that matters—community can be created. Plan ahead. Give yourself permission to change plans or have a backup if things feel overwhelming. Be gentle with yourself. Indulge in self-care, rest, or quiet rituals if that’s what you need. Honor your loved one. Find a way to remember them that makes you smile—light a candle, cook their favorite dish, or share a story. For me, comfort comes from believing my dad is looking down on us, especially when we’re struggling during this family-centered season. I often look for signs from him—and he never disappoints. If you have suggestions to add, I’d love to hear them. And if you’d like to reach out to KTCWK for a little support, I’m always happy to be an unprofessional shoulder.

Every December, certain symbols remind us of the season—twinkling lights, evergreen trees, and the vibrant poinsettia. Today, December 12th, we celebrate National Poinsettia Day, honoring a flower that has become inseparable from Christmas. The poinsettia naturally blooms in winter, but its story stretches back centuries. The Aztecs used the plant for medicinal purposes, long before it became a holiday staple. Mexican legend tells of a young girl named Pepita, who gathered weeds as a humble gift for baby Jesus. Miraculously, the weeds transformed into brilliant red blooms. The red leaves came to symbolize the Star of Bethlehem and the Blood of Christ, while white varieties represent purity. Franciscan priests later incorporated poinsettias into Nativity scenes, cementing their spiritual significance. The flower’s journey to the United States began with Joel Roberts Poinsett, the first U.S. Ambassador to Mexico, appointed by President James Monroe. A diplomat and botanist, Poinsett was captivated by the plant and sent clippings back to his home in South Carolina. He cultivated them, and the flower soon carried his name—poinsettia. The poinsettia’s rise as a Christmas icon owes much to the Ecke family of California, who marketed it as the holiday flower. By showcasing poinsettias on programs like The Tonight Show and the Bob Hope Christmas Specials, they propelled the plant into American homes and traditions. Today, poinsettias are exchanged as heartfelt gifts and brighten holiday décor everywhere. With over 100 varieties, more than two million are sold each year, making them the largest potted flower crop in the U.S. I even have a couple glowing in my home as I write this. So, here’s to the poinsettia—an enduring bloom that bridges ancient legend, cultural tradition, and modern celebration. Happy National Poinsettia Day from KTCWK.

Last night, I hosted my very first micro-exchange Christmas party with my dinner club girlfriends—the Fab 5. If you haven’t seen this trend on TikTok, here’s the idea: a small group of friends gathers, and each person brings the same small gift for everyone in the group. The presents are tossed into the middle of the table, and everyone grabs one until they walk away with the same number of gifts they brought. It’s high-energy, lighthearted, and so much fun. I sent the ladies a TikTok video to explain, but most couldn’t open it since they aren’t on the app. No matter—it didn’t take long for everyone to catch on, and the laughter began almost immediately. We circled around the table, gossiped, caught up on each other’s lives, lifted each other up, and nibbled holiday treats while sipping spirited drinks. As the scent of cinnamony wassail filled the room and my dogs barked outside, hoping for a taste, I looked around at my friends. We’re all at different stages of life and career—some riding highs, others navigating lows—but when we come together, we share a bond that sparks joy. In a world that can feel overwhelming, it’s heartwarming to belong to a tight-knit group that shows up, even on a Tuesday night, simply because it’s the only night that works. So, here’s to the Fab 5 and our first micro-exchange—perhaps the start of an annual tradition. Because it’s these moments, small yet meaningful, that I treasure most and look forward to year after year.

Last November, my S.O. took me to the Greenbrier Resort in Sulphur Springs, West Virginia. Known as America’s Resort, the Greenbrier sits nestled in the Allegheny Mountains and has welcomed guests since 1778. Its reputation as a five‑star destination is matched by its timeless elegance—lavish ballrooms, sweeping verandas, and Dorothy Draper’s iconic interior design that bursts with bold colors and patterns. Walking through its halls feels like stepping into a living museum of American hospitality, where presidents, royalty, and celebrities have all stayed. There is even a Hallmark-style movie set at the Greenbrier called “Christmas at the Greenbrier” that you can watch in their theater or rent when you get home. The resort offers a daily calendar of events reminiscent of Dirty Dancing, with music, singing, classes, excursions, and fine dining that make every moment feel curated. Beyond its beauty, the Greenbrier holds a fascinating secret: beneath its grounds lies a massive Cold War bunker built to shelter the U.S. Congress in case of emergency. Touring the bunker, hearing the story of its construction, and imagining the secrecy surrounding it added a layer of awe to the experience. And of course, during the holiday season, the resort is meticulously decorated—towering Christmas trees, sparkling lights, and festive displays that transform the entire property into a winter wonderland. On our way there, we stopped in some of the quaint little towns nearby, where I noticed sparkling picture frames with bejeweled Christmas trees set inside. They were stunning, but the price tags made me pause—not because they weren’t worth it, but because I thought, I can make that myself. I have always thought of myself as a Martha Stewart (minus the jail time). After our incredible weekend, I set out to recreate these little works of art. I picked up inexpensive holiday frames from a craft store, ordered a bulk lot of junk jewelry online, and gathered decorative paper and glue. With my daughter and S.O. at the table beside me, we cut the paper to size, removed the hardware from the jewelry, and began arranging the pieces freehand into the shape of a Christmas tree. Overlapping the jewelry gave the design depth and sparkle, and once we were satisfied, we glued everything in place. It felt like decorating a gingerbread house—layered, playful, and full of laughter. After drying overnight, the jeweled frames became dazzling decorations, heartfelt gifts, and even embellishments for wrapped presents. More than anything, the joy of creating them together turned this DIY project into a cherished holiday memory.

A smell that instantly reminds me of Christmas is Wassail. Wassail is my favorite Christmas drink to make. It is a non-alcoholic, citrusy blend that delivers a comforting dose of vitamin C during the cold season and smells as delightful as it tastes. The word wassail originated in the 18th-century England as a greeting, meaning “a toast to good health,” later evolving to describe caroling from door to door, and today it’s also known as a cozy apple cider drink. The recipe I use begins with apple cider—not juice—as the base, combined with orange juice, pineapple juice, whole cloves pressed into a whole apple, an orange, cranberries, cinnamon sticks, and a pinch of nutmeg. Some variations include star anise or lemon slices, though I prefer to keep mine simple. Simmered in a crock pot or on the stove for an hour—or even all day—the flavors infuse into a warm, fragrant drink perfect for sipping by the fire on a chilly day. For years, I’ve made a crock each Christmas season at my office, filling the hallway with its inviting aroma and drawing everyone together in the breakroom. Wassail has become more than a drink; it’s a tradition that embodies comfort, connection, and cheer. Cheers to you and yours from Kicking the Chaos with Kaylin. 🍎 Wassail Recipe Card Ingredients 2 quarts apple cider (not juice) 2 cups orange juice 1 cup pineapple juice 10 whole cloves (pressed into an apple) 1 whole 1 sliced orange A handful of cranberries 5–7 cinnamon sticks Pinch of nutmeg (Optional: star anise, sliced lemon) (Optional if you want to make your version with alcohol, add a splash of peach schnapps or apple pie moonshine) Instructions Combine all ingredients in a crock pot or large pot. Simmer for at least 1 hour or let it infuse all day for deeper flavor. Serve warm in mugs, curled up by the fire or shared with friends.

When I was in middle school, my dad turned our basement into my bedroom. It was perfectly decorated, complete with the best closet—and a crawl space that became my own personal phone booth. I’d drag my yellow beanbag chair inside, shut the door, and spend hours on the phone with my childhood best friend, Michelle Francisco. We were convinced we set world records for the longest telephone conversations (corded phone attached to the wall, of course). To this day, I still remember Michelle’s number, and I can sing almost every word to most ’80s and ’90s songs. Fast forward to now: I can recall lyrics from decades ago, but I rarely remember what I had for dinner last night or why I walked into a room. That’s why I’ve become the queen of post-it notes. They’re everywhere—on my desk, in the car, even on my bedside table. I once worried this forgetfulness meant early-onset dementia, but my doctor reassured me it’s just normal aging. The difference? Age-related memory loss doesn’t disrupt daily life, while dementia does. So, what can we queen-agers (50+ women redefining midlife) do to reduce cognitive decline? Here are some tried-and-true strategies: ✨ Stay Social: Spending quality time with others lowers stress, which benefits your brain. Laughter and connection are medicine. 🧘 Manage Stress: Stress makes memory lapses more likely. Find rituals that calm you—whether it’s meditation, journaling, or an activity like mistletoe hunting with family. 😴 Prioritize Sleep: Good sleep is essential for memory consolidation. I love a good nap and yes, naps count. 🧩 Challenge Your Brain: Games like Sudoku, reading (your favorite blog), learning a new language (wunderbar!), or even trying a new recipe keep your brain flexible. 🏃 Move Your Body: While it might not always be fun, exercise stimulates the brain and improves blood flow. Even a brisk walk helps. 🥗 Eat for Your Brain: You can still have doughnut every now and then but try to also squeeze in antioxidants and omega-3-rich foods (think salmon, walnuts, blueberries) keep brain cells clicking. So, if you’re part of the absent-minded post-it note club, take heart: you’re not alone. And remember, reading this blog is one more way to keep your mind young.... Keep following along at kickingthechaoswithkaylin.com—because together, we’re rewriting what it means to age with creativity, humor, and resilience.

For years, it was just my daughter and me. We built our holidays around what we wanted, when we wanted, without needing to factor in anyone else’s opinions. This Thanksgiving, though, was something entirely new. It was our first blended holiday—spent with my significant other, my bonus daughter, and his Florida family. A Sistership Blossoms Both girls are only children, but despite the seven-year age gap, I watched a beautiful sisterhood bloom before my eyes. They even saved each other in their phones as “sissy.” My heart overflowed with joy, often spilling down my cheeks as happy tears. Firsts Everywhere This trip was full of firsts: ✈️ Our first plane ride together as a family, complete with airport snacks and giggles. 📸 A beach photo shoot with Erin Spence Photography in Melbourne, Florida—fun, easy, and stunning results. 🦃 Thanksgiving dinner outdoors under the Florida sun, with Ibises flying overhead. 🏖️ A stroll through Cocoa Beach the city of “I Dream of Jeanie”, including a stop at the RonJon Surf Shop where I found a t-shirt that reminded me of my childhood and watching the sun dip below the horizon from the pier. 🎢 A whirlwind Disney Park Hopper day—Animal Kingdom, Magic Kingdom, Hollywood Studios, and Epcot—all in one chilly (55 degrees in Florida), magical marathon. The Joy of Blending Blending families can be challenging, but this trip reminded me how blessed we are. Both girls were open-minded enough to give their parent’s new partner a chance—and even more, to embrace the idea of being part of a duo instead of an only child. Watching them laugh together in matching jammies, pitch in with Thanksgiving prep, and create inside jokes was proof that love can expand in unexpected ways. We came home with treasured photos, new traditions, and memories that will last a lifetime. Family isn’t defined only by bloodlines—it’s defined by love, effort, and the willingness to embrace new chapters. So, here’s to all the blended families navigating new waters. May your holidays be filled with firsts, laughter, and happy tears. And if you’ve found your own rituals or stories in blending, we at KTCWK would love to hear them.

The holidays call for different kinds of movie magic depending on how you’re feeling. Here’s my personal lineup — from laugh-out-loud comedies to tear-jerking cartoons — each one a gem in its own right. 😂 Best Funny Christmas Movie: Four Christmases This one has it all — a star-studded cast, relatable family chaos, and razor-sharp humor. It’s packed with unforgettable quotes, like: “I don’t want to speak ill of your mother on Christmas, but she’s nothing but a common street whore.” I can watch this over and over again and still laugh out loud. 💔 Best Tear-Jerker Cartoon: Annabelle’s Wish Just thinking about this tender little calf makes me misty-eyed. Annabelle gives up her dream of becoming one of Santa’s reindeer so her mute friend Billy can have his wish. It’s heartbreakingly sweet, but don’t worry — the ending shines with hope. 🔫 Best “Is It or Isn’t It?” Christmas Movie: Die Hard The debate rages on, but I’m firmly in the camp that says Die Hard is a Christmas movie. Holiday themes run throughout, and honestly — who doesn’t love Bruce Willis saving the day? 🦌 Best Classic Cartoon from Childhood: Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer This one was tough because there are so many classics, but Rudolph wins for me. I remember sitting in front of the TV, waiting for the night the TV Guide promised it would air. The stop-motion animation felt magical, and the story has everything: love, teamwork, good conquering evil, and the timeless spirit of Christmas. 🎅 Best Tim Allen Christmas Movie: The Santa Clause Tim Allen has a whole holiday collection, but the original Santa Clause is my favorite. His silly antics and holiday shenanigans make this one endlessly fun to revisit. 🥊 Best Modern Action Christmas Movie: Red One I watched this last year and loved how fresh it felt. Action-packed, full of cool characters, and a unique storyline — it stood out from the usual cookie-cutter holiday fare. 🍪 Best Cookie-Cutter Christmas Movie: Any Hallmark Christmas Movie Speaking of cookie-cutter, I’m not knocking them. Hallmark movies are perfect background comfort. You know exactly what’s going to happen, which makes them ideal for baking cookies, scrolling your phone, or just curling up on the couch. 💕 Best Love Story Christmas Movie: Serendipity A classic rom-com with a holiday twist, this one hits just right. It’s sweet, magical, and reminds us that sometimes fate has a hand in love. ✨ Those are my picks — a queen-ager’s guide to Christmas movies by mood. What about you? Do you have a favorite that always makes your holiday list? Maybe there’s one I missed.

I’ve never been a master wrapper—but I do love giving pretty gifts. Over the years, I’ve discovered festive tricks that make presents feel extra special, even if they’re not wrapped with precision. Whether it’s homemade candy or a heartfelt keepsake, it’s the presentation that turns a simple gift into a memory. 🍬 Peppermint Dishes: Edible & Adorable One of my favorite holiday rituals is making Christmas candy, cookies, and other sweet sundries. To present these goodies with flair, I craft edible peppermint dishes using starlight mints. They’re festive, functional, and fun to make. Here’s how: Grab red and green starlight mints from Walmart and a roll of wax paper. Preheat your oven to 350°F. Unwrap the mints (the least fun part!) and arrange them on a wax paper–lined baking sheet or tart pan. Let the mints touch—they’ll melt together. Bake for 5–8 minutes, watching closely. They melt fast! For plates, let them cool completely. Be gentle—these candy dishes are fragile. For bowls, while still warm, gently drape the wax paper over an inverted bowl. Let it cool and set. Peel off the wax paper and voilà—a Christmassy mint dish! Fill with treats, wrap in cling or cellophane, and finish with a ribbon and a sprig of pine. And when the dish is emptied? It becomes a snack itself. 🧦 Stockings: The Two-for-One Wonder Stockings are a gift and wrapping in one. Choose one that fits the recipient’s personality, tuck in a small present, and add a candy cane for flair. No wrapping required—just heart. 🎄 Under-the-Tree Twinkle: Personal Touches If you love the look of gifts under a twinkling tree, spice up your wrapping with personal touches: Tie on a commemorative ornament or something the recipient loves. For kids, add a candy cane or holiday Pez dispenser. Just beware of placing food under the tree—dogs have a whiffer that can sniff out treats! Gift Tags with Heart: Repurposed Christmas Cards Want to up your gift tag game? Save those old Christmas cards and turn them into personalized tags that feel like tiny keepsakes. Here’s how: Cut out the front of the card, choosing a scene or design that makes your heart happy. Trim it down to a tag-sized piece—any shape works! Punch a hole in the corner, thread through a cheerful ribbon, and attach to your gift. Bonus: write a little note or memory on the back to make it even more meaningful. This is a beautiful way to recycle, commemorate past holidays, and add a sentimental touch to your wrapping. Each tag becomes a mini moment—like a visual whisper of Christmases gone by.

I’m no master chef—but I do love cooking for the people I love. Every Christmas, I make coconut macaroons. They’re simple, festive, and always disappear fast. I gift them to neighbors, bring batches to the office, and serve them on my homemade peppermint candy dishes (if you haven’t read my post on edible gift presentation, check it "Gift Wrapping With Pizazz"). These macaroons are my go-to holiday treat: easy to make, endlessly giftable, and just fancy enough to feel special. 🥥 Coconut Macaroon Recipe Ingredients: 1⅓ cups coconut flakes ⅓ cup sugar 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour ⅛ teaspoon salt 2 egg whites ½ teaspoon vanilla extract (I usually triple this recipe—and then make several triple batches!) Directions: In a small bowl, combine coconut, sugar, flour, and salt. Stir in egg whites and vanilla; mix well. Drop by rounded teaspoonfuls onto greased baking sheets. Bake at 325°F for 18–20 minutes until golden brown. Optional: Broil for 1 minute at the end for extra golden perfection. Let cool completely. Optional Chocolate Dip: Melt baking chocolate in a double boiler. Dip half of each cooled macaroon into the chocolate. Add crushed candy cane or holiday sprinkles for flair. 🎁 Presentation Tips Place your macaroons on a homemade peppermint candy dish (see my Gift Wrapping with Pizazz post for instructions). Wrap in cellophane, tie with ribbon, and gift with love. These treats are festive, heartfelt, and edible from top to bottom.

I’m sure many of you can think back to your childhood and remember something magical about Christmas that’s now a distant memory. Back then, people looked forward to the future when it came to their Christmas trees—aluminum trees with color wheels, or live ones dripping in tinsel like a glitter explosion. Some were so heavily flocked it looked like a blizzard had hit the living room. Today, we crave a more natural look: gently snow-dusted branches, minimalist elegance, or even multiple trees throughout the home, each with its own theme. The evolution is striking—and so is the nostalgia. 📖 Remember the Sears Wish Book? We’d circle our favorite toys, dog-ear pages, and write heartfelt letters to Santa. Now, kids Google their wish lists, text them to parents, and track packages like mini logistics managers. Still, the magic isn’t lost—you can even have Santa send a personalized letter from the North Pole to keep the wonder alive. 🎶 Caroling used to be a community affair. Neighbors and churches would stroll through neighborhoods singing joyfully. These days, if the doorbell rings, people check their Ring cameras and dive behind the couch like it’s a surprise audit. 🚂 My dad used to set up a train around our tinsel-drenched tree. He’d pour oil into the smokestack, and real steam would puff out as it circled the base. Trains still exist, but they’re rarely part of the tree-scape anymore. 🛍️ Layaway plans were the norm. You’d pay a little at a time, and the store would hold your gift until it was paid in full. Now, we swipe the card, get the gift instantly, and worry about the bill later. Shopping used to mean visiting stores or flipping through catalogs. Now, brick-and-mortar shops are fading, and online shopping reigns supreme. ✨ Christmas lights have gone from neighborhood strolls to drive-thru spectacles. You can still cruise through neighborhoods, but now there are designated light parks—paid by the carload, synchronized to music, and Instagram-ready. 🎅 Santa’s visit has leveled up. We used to leave out milk and cookies. Now, the reindeer get carrots or glittery reindeer food. Kids wake up to sleigh tracks, boot prints, notes from Santa, maybe even a torn piece of red fabric snagged on the fireplace. TikTok has even shown homes where Santa “accidentally” left his wallet. 🍿 Garland used to be a family affair—popcorn and cranberries strung with care. These days, garland comes in every form imaginable, but rarely homemade and rarely edible (lest the pets launch a midnight tree raid). So yes, it’s lovely to reflect on the Christmases of the past. But I also embrace the magic of modern traditions—and we’ve even created a few of our own. The beauty is: there’s no right or wrong. You can blend nostalgia with novelty and craft a Christmas that’s perfect for you and yours. 📺 When Christmas Specials Were a Family Event Before streaming, before DVRs, before “watch it anytime”—there was the TV guide. And if you were a kid in the '70s, '80s, or even early '90s, you knew the thrill of flipping through those pages to find out exactly when “A Charlie Brown Christmas,” “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer,” and “Frosty the Snowman” would air. Miss it? Too bad. There were no reruns, no replays, no second chances. We’d gather around the television—rabbit ears adjusted just so, the turnable knob ready for action. I’d lay on the floor and twist that knob with my toes (don’t act like you didn’t do that too). It was a full-family affair. Pajamas, popcorn, and the glow of the screen. And the next day at school? Everyone was buzzing about the show. It was communal, magical, and fleeting. Now, we’ve got more Christmas content than we can shake a stick at. And while it’s wonderful to have access to the classics on demand, something about that shared anticipation has faded. The tradition has shifted—but the memories remain. Did you turn the channels with your toes? What shows did you watch, what memories of Christmases past do you have and what traditions do you miss or now have? Here at Kicking the Chaos, we want to know what rituals make your season sparkle?