Patience Is a Virtue… But So Is Living Like You Mean It

Somewhere along the way, we were all told that patience is a virtue. A noble trait. A sign of maturity. A marker of emotional intelligence. And sure — in theory, it sounds lovely. Like something you’d embroider on a pillow or whisper to a toddler who’s two minutes away from a meltdown.

But lately? I’ve been feeling about as patient as a cat watching someone dangle a string just out of reach. And honestly, I’m starting to wonder if patience is overrated.

I don’t think I’ve always been this way. I’ve always been a woman of action — a doer, a planner, a “let’s make it happen” kind of human. But ever since my father passed away, something in me shifted. Time suddenly feels… finite. Tangible. Like something you can hold in your hands and watch slip through your fingers if you’re not paying attention.

And now? When my significant other casually mentions taking a trip a year from now, I’m already halfway through booking hotels, mapping routes, and checking flight prices. Waiting? I don’t know her.

So, I decided to take a closer look at this whole patience thing — partly out of curiosity, partly because I suspect I might be driving the people around me a little bit bananas.

Turns out, patience comes in three flavors:

1. Interpersonal Patience

This is the patience you show your loved ones, coworkers, the person in front of you in the grocery store who seems personally offended by the concept of “moving forward,” and the driver ahead of you who believes turn signals are optional.

Let’s just say… this is not my strongest category at the moment.

2. Patience in Life’s Hardships

This is the grit stuff. The perseverance. The “life knocked me down but I’m getting back up because I have things to do” patience.

Ironically, this is where I shine. I’ve weathered storms, walked through grief, and kept going. I can handle the big stuff. It’s the tiny, everyday nonsense that makes me want to scream into a pillow.

3. Daily Patience

Ah yes, the patience required for the little hassles of life — slow Wi-Fi, long lines, the barista who spells your name “Kailynn” for the seventh time.

This is where my fuse is currently the length of a matchstick.

So How Do We Practice Patience Without Losing Our Spark?

The key word here is practice. Not perfection. Not sainthood. Practice.

Shift Your Perspective

Instead of seeing slowing down as an obstacle, try seeing it as an opportunity. (Yes, I rolled my eyes writing that, but stay with me.)

Slow Down on Purpose

Read a book. Take a walk. Take a nap. Do something that forces your brain to stop sprinting.

Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable

This one is a doozy. Sitting in discomfort feels like wearing a sweater made of cactus. But it’s where growth happens.

Accept That You Are Not in Control of Everything

I know. I hate it too. But some things are simply out of your hands — and that’s okay.

Stop Taking Everything So Seriously

Not everything is a crisis. Not everything needs a plan. Not everything needs your immediate action. (I’m saying this to myself as much as to you.)

And Remember: Too Much Patience Is Also a Problem

If you’re sacrificing your happiness, your needs, or your joy in the name of being endlessly patient… that’s not virtue. That’s martyrdom. Hard pass.

Here’s to the Impatient Ones

Here’s to the people who feel time moving faster now. Here’s to the ones who want to squeeze every drop of marrow out of life while they still can. Here’s to the planners, the doers, the “let’s book it now” crowd. Here’s to the ones who know that life is short and want to live it fully, loudly, and intentionally.

If that makes us impatient? So be it.

I’ll take impatient and alive over patient and passive any day.